What the hell should I do?

Choice number 1 leaves us all at a loss.
Leave this world, and raise myself to a new existence
So many would mourn my departure;
The majority barely able to recollect my essence
Who would feel the burden most?
Would it be the person that I felt as deeply for?
Maybe there was someone else,
Maybe someone who had felt that they knew me even more…
Things are too vague in my mind.
I don’t know what is going before my eyes,
I’m too worried about what’s going on between my ears
I wonder about all the possible lies
I can’t relate to these people around me
My mind is incompatible with theirs,
Like Nintendo to Super
My mind is different.
Choice number two is even worse yet.
Rise up and confront all that bothers me
Pummel those who offend me into the ground
Beat them senseless and hope they choose not to be offended
Become something I am not
Lose control over that which I don’t have control over already
I’ve lost my handle of situations, world wide
Enough of a grip on reality to feel myself slipping
Into a place devoid of this bullshit,
Where everyone understands
A place of existence
That isn’t where we are.
I always have to worry about others existing and being offended
Or choosing to oppose me in my transcendence
So much is lost in fear
So much is lost in hate
Too much is lost for me to want to continue
As I sit here, tears streaming
I realize that there is no third choice.